"The ocean is 75 percent of the world…might as well fart in it."
"You can rub my six pack while I sing to you. Does that sound good?"
"I’m gonna shoot my web in your face."
"I’m not saying anything anymore so it doesn’t go on here."
"Don’t wear shirts like that - they look funny. It’s like a bra that goes too far down."
"It would be so much easier to get jobs after we graduate college if people knew spelling and grammar.
There should be a test people have to pass in order to graduate. It would eliminate 80% of graduates and I could get a better job."
There should be a test people have to pass in order to graduate. It would eliminate 80% of graduates and I could get a better job."
"Ah! My orifices!"
"I don’t do karate. I just shoot mother effers."
We’re back from Israel…let the quotes begin.
You should ere on the side of righteousness rather than relevance.
"Telemarketers in a pine tree with porn cakes. Sour patch kids and telemundo."
— Blake writing songs.
"People in need aren’t the only people who need someone to make them feel good."
"Bet you can’t tell that I have a whole roll of trash bags in my pants right now…it’s kinda rubbing on my testicles."
"Jesus wept… Mary swept…That’s the 2nd shortest verse in the bible."
"
Alcohol before tea, you will always have to pee.
Tea before alcohol, shits crazy!
"
